Sunday, August 14, 2016

From the Other Side

By Cindy Pitts Gilbert  Buford Weekly Illustrated August 17, 2016

I know you are thinking this is going to be one of those  articles about the afterlife.  We’ll save that for another day. Today I want to speak to those who are in the depths of a struggle.  When trauma and heartache happen to us may it be; a breakup or a divorce, or perhaps you are in a career that isn’t working for you anymore or some overwhelming financial crisis.

Whatever it may be, all you know is that you are in pain and what your friends and family know is that you cannot think clearly.  You literally can’t see the forest for the trees. Your heart just aches. I have experienced some pretty significant personal losses and traumas. I have had to completely start over more than once and ask myself the question through the anguish, how will I survive this? Can I tell you a secret from the other side? 

You will survive it. It will take time and it will also mean that you have to make the choice to move past the pain, and often you have to learn to forgive and let the past go. Then you make a decision to put a new plan in place and start again.  We are all so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.  The key for me now is to know that although some of the things that I feared would happen did happen yet I not only survived them,  I learned from them and came out stronger on the other side.

After my worst fears came to life, I mourned the losses sometimes wallowing in them for a while, then slowly the pain and the discomfort of hardship or sadness settled. I learned to appreciate what I have, Then developed a new plan and started over again.  Each and every time becoming more peaceful, stronger and a happier version of myself.  So from the other side let me assure you that you will be ok. 

Choosing the simple things over the complicated ones is better and when you are ready, learn the lessons from the experience.  Don’t sweat the small stuff, no really don’t! Things are just things and do not make you happy. Healthy relationships can replace unhealthy ones, that is provided you learned your lesson. We all have a road to travel and each experience is unique. You are not alone please remember that we, your friends and family want to be there to help you through it, so let us.  Look out, because you are gonna love the new you.

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